 Thursday, February 15, 2007
 at 10:35 PMback from work, missed service n the whole bunch of joy in church n ... most importantly... God's presence. been asking myself whether did i put my heart n soul in work... im such a lazy n slow thinker at work.. but i thank God for my colleagues, i know that im not good enough, i didnt do my follow up on my patients well... but they still cover me. especially Hongmei. thank you!!! but i know i cannot continue this way.. my flesh is beginning to get over me again.. although how much i want myself to perform at work even when there are so little patients.. i really hate myself alot. making silly mistakes and not bringing glory to God. at the back of my mind, if im my colleague, i dun even want to be like myself, so careless n mind always wonders off. nobody wants to be like me. God must have made a mistake choosing me to shine for him.. just now as im waiting for the traffic light to turn green, although i dun usually wait, cos i will just dash across even if its red light. but today funnily i just waited. and i felt God talking to me again. He told me everything is worth the wait, He chose me becos He loves me for who i am, (though im lazy, careless n nothing like Him).. im thinking in my heart. He is going to turn situations around, my weakness to become my strength, so that everyone around me can see the change in me. i've been thinking.. all the way from work place to my house.... im afraid to put high hopes in myself again... im afraid i might fail Him n the promises to Him. as im walking... im also listening to the song " everyday... i draw closer to You Lord... " if i didnt draw near to Him everyday yet i sing it in my heart, will it be cheating on God? thinking of how God will feel, i switched off my mp3. its quiet time again, i guess i got to tell my flesh to submit to my spirit, and also with fasting.. which i think i seriously need. good night ppl. xoxo, you know you love me Tuesday, February 13, 2007
at 9:39 AMhappy valentine'sday!!! tomorrow is the day.. hmm how are all my friends doing? vivi, celia, jastina, monica n jas!! haiyo everytime when i have time to write my blog i dunno what i can write, but when i got things to write i got no time to write.. so ... ya recently i also infected my tonsils, now quite healed le. but still cannot eat hard stuff.. its the worse disease ever.. cos i cant eat all my fave food. been to ttsh ENT and checked on my throat. xray and getting appt n stuff.. heng it wasnt something serious. but still its like swallow saliva also pain kind.. so i prayed n prayed eat medicine n eat medicine. the whole tonsil is a full of ulcers lor.. but now like getting better but not so thoroughly healed yet. i must get well b4 cny!! things to do: do the research of things in nursing return my comics start fasting for my own life shopping list liquid eyeliner throat watermelon lozenges a dress bottoms xoxo, you know you love me |
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