 Wednesday, January 26, 2011
 at 1:58 PMWe are no Superman... Really felt inspired by yyuniverse about his 1st entry about fighing for a chance. Its not always a bed or roses when life dump its waste on us. People whom we least expected to be hurt by, will come haunting us with the negativity that drain every part of our soul away... When we are christians, there is no special path after we chose the God that we want to believe in, and put our hopes in. It just simply mean that we have a refuge, a support and strength to continue to deal with all the negative stuff , pressure and stress borrowed from God. Nothing more, just plain obedience and keeping our ways to His love commandments. I couldn't bring myself to think of one day if God stop forgiving us and give us grace and mercy, I think our souls would have been banished to the deepest pit of hell. Once ppl tell me that once a saint always a saint, I doubt the saying of this phrase. Because what I believe is a constant renewal before God and it is not a one time thing about being "cleanse" by God. It is a walk with God, until the day we die. Sometimes I really wonder why I am behaving this way, making the people around me got frustrated and upset with me. I am who I am, and I really need time to change to the image they want me to be or rather who God wants me to be. I know I may not be perfect, and all the flaws I already know that I have. Please treat me like an adult, due respect needed and also loving words of concern will be more than enough. I don't usually have high expectation of people, and definitely its give and take which let allows us to experience grace from the Church family in this imperfect world. I thank God for people who readily give grace like Jesus and definitely believe that nobody learns by getting scolded. The buffer period to relief the pain from the hurtful words, can be use to encourage an individual properly, the results can be more successful then the hurtful words which linger for a long time in the heart. Lastly, just to remind us of what love is... Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. If love is not in your equation, whatever you do, will just come to nothing. xoxo, you know you love me Tuesday, January 18, 2011
at 11:25 PMIts really has been a long while since I last blogged! :) Well things haven been real smooth though, and has been always a series of emotions going up and down, like a roller coaster or should I say a swing, when there is a certain high, then it began to go down slowly again. Times has really been the uncertain, since I've decided to join School of Theology to deepen my longing and understanding for God and His ministry. Firstly, I got to leave my job for my classes, becos of the timings which cannot accomodate each other. I was really at a total lost, its like I've nv been uncertain for the future like I am now. Like my family, they r not supportive and questions of why I chose to go SOT came bombarding my mind from various others... "why will u achieve after studying this course? will u become a pastor after that? What has that gotta do with ur nursing career? Will it increase ur pay? how are u going to pay off the school fees? Well it was not as easy as I thought it would be obviously, but still having prepared answers didn't help as much. -.-||| Some people really cared, encouraged me to go on with my faith, and I would definitely achieve what I wanted and came out stronger. Some discouraged me, like ask me to postpone it till further date, most of the ppl remain neutral about it, but I guess in their hearts they might not think it is wise. I really hate to leave the place that I found my passion back in nursing, hate to leave the colleagues that I love dearly, sometimes its really them that make my days colourful and filled with joy. Why do I have to choose between them and God? But sadly I have to choose the One that will bring me life and light, the one who comforts me in the middle of the night when everyone is asleep, when I felt so stressed out at work, or got a negative comment from my parents, the one place I'll run to, its my room, where I can quietly cool myself down through prayer and finding the promise that He has for me. He is the only one who gently remind and nv jeers on me when I did badly. What more can I ask from a God who is like a friend? :) I know that He will nv short change me, He will smile when He knows that I chose Him over my comfort zone. To my dear colleague and friend who are in stress, be cool about ur work, focus on the positive and remember to release urself, after a day's stress, everyone's stress relieve ways are different, some like to binge, some like to listen to certain music, some like to catch a great movie, some like to shop, or buy something that will cheer them up. what's urs? In life there are just too many things to worry about, they are mainly catagorized in 2 groups: 1) Worry about things that you can do about it. 2) Worry about things that you can't do about it. Sad to say most of us worry about the things that we can't do about it. Things that we can do about it, we already start doing something about it. Things we couldn't do about it, just leave it to God, as long as you put ur best, God will do the rest!!! :) So actually there is NOTHING to worry about!!! With Love, Hazel Zoe xoxo, you know you love me |
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