Hi (:
My name is Chair and I rock.
Seventeen candles on the 28th September '09. I ♥ cocktails, cocaine, and clubbing.

PARAMORE
is the bomb.
you know you love me
xoxo


put a more detailed profile here. (:




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at 11:14 PM

I Simply Love Eva

though its been long since i last spoken to her, missed her hair n her alot, recently i kept thinking of her and remembered the ways that she handles things. she is someone i really admire, i always look to her when i feel that i cant carry on.

Tenacity:
she is always holding on to things which God approves of and persevere on even when she is tired, she put things of God above her own physical needs. recently i feel quite drained esp after easter, becos the whole of easter is some personal intensive molding time for my way of handling relationships with ppl and follow up on new friends. this is something i find that im not that hard on, becos ppl who brought friends usually tell me not to push their new friends, yes its true, but this is the time for harvest, regular followup is still needed in their life, care n concern n essential help on the way is always needed when u r at the frontline when they met with crisis of their life. followup = important = tenacity

Do not Delay Problem:
it is what i learn from her, becos she is always fast in handling problems when first noted, be quick! be quick to cut away any wrong thinking or bad roots when its still early. she always solve or deal with the problem on the go, without delay and may sure everything is set right before she moves on. yes it is very important too,becos its the same in the spiritual realm!! be quick!! to submit all ur thoughts, whether it is good or evil thoughts, cut away anything that doesnt please God, then the path between u n Him will be clean, clear, blessing and prosperity, family salvation, everything that u hope or wish for will come pouring down!! when God suddenly take a peep on Earth, u can do a victory sign to Him n u can see him smiling back at u straight!!! :D hehe...

Fasting n Prayer do wonders:
just look at how their cg fast n pray, i think i should check my heart. hahaha.. yes Eva fast n pray without hesitant, ever ready to fight the devil like ah li, fight fight fight!!! we r the majority u know!! becos God is with us nothing can be against us. i have broke fast since last week, though i should be happy, im eating meat u know! haha.. but i dun feel the fulfilment, the satisfaction the happiness which i feel, i know it must be the spirit man, hungry for more spiritual things. very happy that Gershon says having full fast on tues. i always feel God moving when fasting in grps, God always appear de. hehe.. its flesh fighting again but im not afraid. :D God please retain the friends n let them grow roots in church, find love n peace in ur house n family. thank you Jesus.

Faithful friend:
she always listens n lend a shoulder to cry on when needed, she is sensitive to her peers needs and problems, i still remember when she prayed for every single one in my birthday chalet, God uses ppl who r willing n obedient. someone like her is my role model, my acheivement n my honour to know her. i've always want to be a faithful friend, but sometimes i just hate my working hours, so incompatible, somemore im not such a quality time person, it reli takes me alot to hang out with others. my fave passtime is to watch anime n eat my meal in my room, sleep n nv wake up. im such a boring person. but i must hang out, i must influence. i want to sow seeds in others so my harvest will come. i dun want to let go of them, they will come true one day. God will see to it. i want to sow friendship seeds, relationship seeds, time seeds, salvation seeds, etc.



ps: i think God must have revealed this to me, you r an amazing leader Eva!! God is smiling at you!!


at 11:12 PM

Family for life

Everyone has flaws, you, me her, him and them. not everyone can accept me as who i am,

not everyone is willing to stay with a person like me. i hate myself though, who can love a me

who is made is this way? haha. sometimes hurtful words or what i perceived the meaning of

the words, just come my way, i have to swallow, hard, even though it is painful, especially

from someone whom u reli care abt or treat as a true friend. i have learnt my lesson once

from a close friend of mine, scolded me left right centre, broken my heart n almost tear me

apart. now i fell again. dear hazel hazel, u got to wake up, u got to put the right ppl in, becos it

reli takes alot to choose the ones who will build u than those who condemns. yes u r right,

love covers, love is longsuffering, love endures, love is patient n kind. i have learned how to

love, not through the friends whom i hang out most with, but from my parents, who choose to

love a me who is so rude n rebellion to them sometimes, they choose to invest time n money

n most importantly, love which i can nv find elsewhere. haha its kind of stupid to blog about

family love yea? becos u might think that isnt it suppose to be a family with love? nope. not

everyone is fortunate like me u know?? hehe.. though i love Gershon's dad, who is simply

cute. i still remember how my mum used to love me even through times when i dun have time

for her. she will come to my room late at night when i had travelled a whole day, from work

to cgm n back home,problems with my legs muscles, i remembered that day it was hard for

me. she just came in and ask me what i did today, i answered with some 2 to 3 word answer

n told her to leave becos i wanna rest. she knew that my legs r tired, she just sat by the

bedside n rub some medicated oil for me, i was lying back facing her. i just teared. i know she

loves me. i told her thanks becos i didnt know how to express my appreciation 4 her. people

of the world or in the church, may care for u, to me love is still the most tangible in a family

, physical family. its family salvation which i always looked forward, i have always dreamed

about. its destiny, its God-made, to be one family for life.

at 12:17 AM

today was a day out with leon n friends, i felt comfortable with all these ppl whom im out with, i know this dun happen for no reason, and i understand that if i keep staying at the same place, everyone will move on with their life, they will be sure to group me as a someone that is shallow.? haha no la just my foolish thinking, always speaking in my head that i dun have any common things with them to talk about, what i say is totally useless n foolish n unserious. sometimes when i think back i knew maybe i brought it upon myself. hahaha,, am i a pessimist? goodness i dunno why i write this post, ppl who read my blog, dun be moody, taurus also have emo times,like what leon says, "shuang yu zhuo" also have emo times. esp some parts of the month. i really wish that i am a boy, so i wun have so many ups n downs n sh*t times. God knock knock, u still love me if i am a boy right? :D i am just being sensitive at the wrong part of words ppl say to me or didnt say again. hate it! i dun want to say s*i or Sh*t again. 4 letter word: love, ship, cake, cars, coki, cafe, yoyo, etc.


at 9:55 PM

CRITERIA FOR A BOYFRIEND

1.Christian who loves God the same way i do or greater.

2.Loves me for who i am, feel for my emotions.

3.honours his own family n my family.

4.Financially stable n generous to others.

5.Lives for dreams which r realistic.

6.kindhearted to the poor n needy


(sorry this is kind of important for the day n for tomorrow n forever. please note. thanks!)


at 9:27 PM

i felt really happy these 2 days, cos i got to know more about my 2 friends serene n liru who r busy working n juggling life events, knowing that they still care n would reli want to put in effort together with me to work things out. i kknow sometimes its hard to be who u r reli in life in front of others, perhaps like what pastor Phil Pringle said, we should be be rooted in our own self image as knowing who we really are in front of others, if we r rooted in others, when others say something bad about us, our world will jus crumble down, thats why he is so determine to let us know that we must be confident in how God has made us how we r today. He also said that its easy to accept Jesus in our hearts, but to accept ourselves in our hearts it not an easy task. cos alot of us suffer from poor self image, self doubting, insecurity. so we got to see ourselves through God's eyes and begin to love ourselves like He did, confident n happy with ourselves, which i nv once thought it is necessary. i hate myself actually, im so flawed. but i got to learn, i must be confident that i am God's child, He has given me power n anointing to achieve what i want in life.


at 11:46 PM

Dear God i reli thank you for the connect group conference call just now. i felt that u have already start working among us, you have not given up on us, i know that though we have different lifes to lead, u r still here to cheer us on and help us to bring in the harvest that r white to harvest, all that u need are labourers who r willing n can see beyong impossibilities, though things seems to not work out, seems to i want to see the cellgroup grow, i want to see our connect grp go up to another level, to be hungry for ur word, be passionate for ur ppl, taking ownership in the connect group, consistent in prayer n fasting, care n concern about each other in the group, i believe You are the Almighty God, You shall surely grant us our desires.i want to pray n fast till i see what u had placed in my heart. Lord i want Your harvest to rain upon us.


PS: please hear my prayer Lord.