Hi (:
My name is Chair and I rock.
Seventeen candles on the 28th September '09. I ♥ cocktails, cocaine, and clubbing.

PARAMORE
is the bomb.
you know you love me
xoxo


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at 2:41 PM

Walking in the Light?

when its all about You, all else doesnt matter anymore, having to live with whatever my friend has got, this is so not what i read from the Bible. This is what i've got from my friend's blog when i read just now, its so pain staking to see my friend in such a state. like that. i grieved, but another part of me just couldnt empathize with that. i couldnt stand poverty in a God filled person's life. i couldnt stand passiveness in making a life out of what God has given. i believe in making the fullest out of what God gave, whether i like it anot. i believe in a price to pay for, in order to bless others, in order to get His word out of the 4 walls of the church. That includes working, that includes serving his people and the ppl around me. it may sound so simple, but its horribly tiring and sometimes u just feel that ur flesh gave u so much problem u have to rest. :\ i once thought that its a waste of time to rest n how it would be good when we dont need to rest and just plug to an electric source for recharge. But true as it is, its still essential, sometimes resting just dont solve problem at all, its still there when i woke up the next day.

Was listening to what Pastor Tan preach on Father's day. learning how childish we are, when we are grown ups, we ask of God's blessing right now and if its not there yet, we began to doubt God. But alot of things just work according to His plan, and He has a wonderful plan for everyone of us, we just cant understand His ways becos its higher than ours.Human just couldnt understand that the world doesnt centralised around ourselves. Gosh. :X we pray according to what we hope and want things to be, when it wasnt this way, we began to lose faith in Him. How unfair it is to God. :/

Coming to understand what He is thinking, u got to work close to His heart and pray and seek after Him. Which i admit i haven reach that close yet. All thanks to pastor and church leaders books and sermons, i've got so much info about God. its good in a way, but its different when u read about ur dad, and when u actually talked to Him. Not to dampen your faith in God, u dont have to be perfect to talk to Him, u just have to be yourself and real when u chat with him in ur own room alone. :)

Learning from ur spiritual Dad is one thing, learning from my physical Dad is another! hmm.. i didnt realise i've got so much to learn from my dad, about life, about time, finance management. its what he is good at, and the best part is he is living in my house!! haha.. no la. how i got this idea? hehe.. i think i got my generosity mostly from my dad, he dont really look at the price when he blesses the family, but when it comes to himself he reli saves and spends carefully.

Lesson 1: Not reli caring how much it is to spend but how many ppl can be fed.
So many times, we are just looking at what we have lost when we give to someone, whether its gift or hard cash. its such a heartache! hehe.. becos we are giving our life to someone else. but its different when u have abundance, u have got MORE life percentage to give. Is ur 100% life = $2000? or $6000? or even more? so make ur percentage worth more, so that u can give others their 20% when u gave a little of urs and u can give alot of ppl of your life! hehe. "let life flows out of you" i guess that is what is means. becos alot of ppl r so short, so busy to earn their 100% life. they will be interested to know ppl who generously give to others instead of taking away.

Lesson 2: If your room is in a mess, how can u do things fast?
LOL. its another sentence my dad says to me, when he cant stand my room in a mess, and i was always rushing out when i reach home from work and i couldnt find my phone, my things when i wanna get out, therefore end up late. Doing things fast is my aim each day, to accomplish a list of things to do, mop the floor, iron clothes eat lunch, get to work, on the way pray, think of what to inspire my ppl. its all running in my mind all the time. haha. but hinderance is my management of time, when i have a cluster to face everyday. haha. Clean tidy is hard when now my sister is moving over to stay temp before her new home is done. Take time to tidy ur room, God will be pleased to come to a room when u ask him to come, therefore, u can do thinks faster n better!

Thats it for the moment. Write more tonight when i got spare time ok! :D bye!


at 4:47 AM

A Secret...

Now doing my night shift, with a cuppa coffee and not feeling the least of the sleepy bug creeping in.. hmm been thinking about what God has revealed to me since a few weeks back, it was all about prayer requests, answered and remembered by God. lol.. while i was praying a few days back, i suddenly got this flashback of the things which i've prayed for, while my mind had forgotten what are the prayers, i guess God nv forgets.

Its about the relationships with the friends i treasure, lol, secret prayers about ppl that i hope their lifes will change, becos of my commitments n responsibilities, i dont usually have so much time to kept thinking about those which r trivial but i hope to see a change in them becos those ppl r important to me. hmm i guess i gotta thank God for it... even when i didnt physically do anything to help except to pray. it should do just the job, becos i bothered .. to pray.

I came to understand that what the Bible says about the prayer answering may not be now, may not be according to the timing which we like, but it will be a timing just right, a timing of God's. haha.. u may say it is a piece of Hoax, its just coindence girl! haha.

Coincidence dont appeal to me since 6 years back.

All things don't happen for fun. They happened for a reason, to fulfil a result, to fulfil purpose and a change of thinking. even Death itself. Some plants may die, to indicate a new beginning for it, the owner gotta remove the dead plant, so that life may be present again after the dead r removed. keke, its from a drama i've watched recently, My Queen.

A friend of mine told me recently about his thinking, that How a person lived his life, its all according to his perception about life. it really has alot of truth in it. learning how u view life, as a success? a failure, days just to kill time, days to improve others life, days to impact others, they r so different, depending on how u see it, and i am glad to say that i have reset my thinking everytime i feel so bad about life, i switch to a clear channel, not losing my focus about the kind of life i want, the kind of life that is ever progressive in everything i do.

I refused to be stagnated. A friend of mine had taught me about learning how to hate poverty, learning how to hate the bad habit enough to kick it out of my life, i cant tolerate heck-care attitudes, becos i used to have it, i dun want to regret later on the care that is suppose to render to others and it was not met n result in unforgivable situations. it hurts and definitely it cant be turned back...

Seen this application on facebook about wish i could turn back time, haha. looked so dumb, there r no way u can turn it back friend, dont dwell on it and feeling sorry about things which u cant change, dont snatch God's role ya. Do things which u can change, guess u will feel better. :)

There is the secret i wanna share with u guys, there r times when i wonder how i can squeeze so many things in 24 hrs/day. so i guess God heard my SECRET prayer about what r things suppose to be done or not to do? He showed me the clock, when i am running late, n if i am doing the correct thing, the time will be passed slower. if i am busy looking for a pair of pants or makeup or some unnecessary stuff and i looked at the clock, it will pass so quickly and i usually ended up late. i guess it is the hint that God is showing me. but i often dont bother about the hints and always end up late becos of my passiveness. haha. yeap, try looking at the clock before u start preparing to get out of ur house, and look at it after finishing a task, u will know which u should not focus ur time on the next time ya!!!

God bless!!! :)

Love Haze.. V. K. Z.